Christmas tree...

Christmas tree have distinct smell. A smell associated with holidays, family gathering and presents. Even if it's an artificial Christmas tree. Natural Christmas trees have piney smells. Some air freshener comes with pine scent in this season. Well, it's either cinnamon, cranberry or pine smell. I read a lot of American home magazine. One can expect 5 air freshener advertisements in one magazine, with samples of course. The magazine itself is just like a portable perfume shop. I wonder if you can burn or plug those magazine to produce nice smelling ambient at home. Don't believe me? Grab the latest Better Homes and Gardens magazine. Even in Australia, where it's summer, Australian House and Gardens do have those piney smells too. And I thought that they celebrate Christmas in July.

In tropical island, there are a few pine trees. One can find a Casuarina tree by the sea. We have a lot in this little city. But those trees have irregular forms. Unlike in the north where Christmas trees are farmed in nurseries and cared for to get those perfect cone shape.

It is more convenient to buy a fake plastic Christmas trees. Those have a distinct smell too. Plastic smell. When this little city was still a small town, fake Christmas trees are hard to find and expensive. And nobody really care if your house have Christmas tree or not. It's not a norm. People would just decorate their houses with garlands and ornaments and festive lights. And maybe nativity scenes. (Just like the French)

The readily available pine like trees are the Casuarinas. There are thousands of them at the beach. So one can cut a young tree and bring it home and decorate. In fact, our first Christmas tree were a Casuarina. Since it is so flexible, (they have to, otherwise, they'll break in strong sea breeze) it can't support a regular Christmas decorations. Back then, baubles are mostly glass. So, we decorated out tree with balloons. One thing about Casuarinas, they are scentless.

In the early 90's we have our first artificial Christmas tree. It is still in good condition except for the stand. Those trees have real life like leaves. Those leaves or needles are rigid unlike the current version. Even the stem and trunks are wood like. I don't see any shop selling these kind of trees. All have hairy trunk and stems. By hairy, I mean fuzzy. It's covered with rafia like green brushes. Ours is life like. So I like ours better.

Like all artificial Christmas trees, they come in boxes. And when those trees are not needed, they are stored in their packaging for about 9 to 10 months. Imagine the plasticy fumes accumulating inside the box. Come November, the tree would release it's scent. Assembling and decorating Christmas trees is the highlight of the year. It's fun. And also shopping for new ornaments. Even the ornaments have a distinct smell.

Growing up, we erect our trees indoors. But when I was posted in the town by the river, most houses put their trees in their porch, outdoor. Taiwanese do the same too. Seldom seen in the big city or little city. Personally, I think the town by the river is the most 'Christian' urban area in this state. Church spires everywhere. In Christmas, Thousands of Christmas trees can be seen, both in retail spaces in the Central Business District and in residential homes. Churches in this town also 'competes' in term of decorations. Unique Christmas trees made of recyclables, most colourful, the tallest. Yup they seems to outdo the other churches.

Larger Christmas trees are also displayed in front of major departmental stores and shopping malls.

Now, the big question is, should I erect my Christmas tree. I'll be celebrating alone. In fact, I've been a Grinch for almost a decade now. In college, I celebrated Christmas alone. My roommates are away in the town celebrating in hotels. In first year medical school, I celebrated it alone. My roommate was away in his church. Second year, my housemates whom are studying Nursing had their holiday in their respective hometown, 3rd year in the town by the big river. Ei, it's almost a decade celebrating Christmas alone. Well, it's a pagan holiday to begin with. So no biggie.

I'm thinking of decorating the Mulberry tree in front of the house if I really want to have a Christmas tree. And celebrate Christmas in KFC like the Japanese?

Casuarina
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Casuarina  

Artificial Christmas tree. Ours was polyethylene molded needle (PE). But being made in the 80's/90's it's less realistic than in this video but better than PVC needle. It's hard to find an exact tree like ours. My parents bought ours at Park Hotel (Back then, it's the grandest hotel in this town)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y-l1VCK1U4M
PVC is too common here.

Well, if I have a lot of money to spare, I'll definitely buy antlers Christmas tree
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iV5dolv53BM

Idle mind is the devil's workshop

That is why, I never keep my mind idle.

After successfully baking cottage pie, I wonder what if I substitute mashed potatoes with mash cauliflower. I've watched some YouTube videos on using cauliflower to substitute carb laden potatoes and even rice. Yup! rice. It's one of Sacha Stevenson's recipe. And making it spicier to increase metabolism. So, this is literally an Atkin's diet. No, not Atkins diet, Atkin's diet.

Hmmm. my next question of the day. Can hermit crab survive sweetwater? I had accidentally, picked a hermit crab while beach combing last Thursday. It's still alive. I'm thinking of making it my pet.
"Say hi to my pet hermit crab" Is Crabby a good name for a hermit crab? It's not crabby though. Just a shy creature.

I wish I could exercise with my imaginary friends, Ben and Carlos. Ben could bring me for a surf someday and Carlos could teach me how to play guitar.

Sacha's cooking challenge (cauliflower rice)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ov1NL_B2zg4

And this guy (cauliflower mash potatoes)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z3gtEfnsYo0

And this duo do cook too
http://www.youtube.com/user/TheLeanMachines/videos

Shaker bottles, where are you?

Another hard to find item in this little city is.... drum-roll please Shaker bottle. A regular shaker bottle with baffles not the one with spring coil balls. I am looking for a particular brand, a Korean brand, Lock&Lock. I had 3 back in the big city.

I know GNC do sell shaker bottles but they are quite expensive. I need a shaker bottle to mix yoghurt with milk. I think my 'home-made' cultured drinks are way creamier than store bought and has no added sugar.

I wish, the big city is just an hour drive, so that I can get my shaker bottles and my ratchet whisk.

Bliss

I am always happy when somebody who deal with me; waitress, cashier, sales promoter is left handed. It's like, hey we're the same gimme 5!

I would say
"You are left-handed too! Yay! Me too! High 5!"

Well we deserve a high 5 after years of discrimination. And giving high 5 is like acknowledging our existence. Or showing support to fellow leftie.

And if it's August. I would say
"Hey the 13th is our day..."

At least I know that I am not alone. It's hard to be the only leftie in the family. And my father, doesn't know or don't bother to know that I am left-handed.

why el feo...

Why am I el feo. Because I think that I am ugly. Some may say it's overrated. Some say I sell myself short. Even my best friend convinced me that I am way better looking than average Joes. But still I think I am ugly. All those compliments (in my opinion) are just to make me feel good no matter how hard they convinced me. It's my self esteem perhaps. Nobody calls me ugly, actually. But a bully called me 'Shrimp paste faced'. Maybe she's just joking and I'm taking it too serious. Imagine applying Bagoong Alamang to your face like a facial mask.

When I was younger, I wish I am as handsome as Ben Affleck. Or Hugh Jackman or Clive Owen or Gabriel Soto. And I can't understand why Hispanic actors in prime time telenovellas are so handsome. Or the Arabs.

I wonder, do guys have insecurities like me? I don't think so. Regular guys doesn't really care how they look. Why should I? Metrosexual? or low self esteem?

So the el feo refers to the ugliness of my self esteem. And do girls really care how guys look? And do girls objectify men like men do towards girls. I don't objectify girls though. They are human, not things. Being treated like a thing is not fun.

It's kinda odd but I kinda feel flattered when somebody thinks that I am gay when I told them I am single. Well, if good guy are always taken, married, dead or gay. A gay guy is a good guy material then.

In simple arithmetic, SINGLE+GOOD LOOKING=GAY

I may be good looking, but I am still jealous of other good looking guys. So that's ugly. The ugly side of me.

Seashells on the seashore.

My brother and I went to the seaside. A beautiful one. Quite isolated but quite famous. Famous of it's natural arch and a sea stack. The beach is quite pristine except for a few debris wash ashore. It's isolated because the access to the beach is difficult. A cliff. We were lucky, some fishermen were there. Returning home from fishing. They showed us the way down. (Actually, we retrace their trail when we thought there's no way to get down to the beach.

Imagine a beach in south Britain. The one with white cliff. Eastbourne. My mother went there with my father. She was expecting our sister. Kneeling at the edge of the cliff with big tummy. Scary. Except. the cliff here isn't white nor tall. But there are fossils embedded on the cliff.

With the sea stack and arches, I told my brother, lets take some picture for our sister. Tell her we're in 12 apostles. Bluffing. Never been outside of this large island, one had to use some imagination or find your 'foreign' destination locally.

There are sea shells on the shore. Some are quite big. Since it's isolated, I think, nobody beach combs and more big shells are left undisturbed. We brought back some sea shells as a memento. Large conch shells with clogged opening. There's no chance for the hermit crab to live in it. We left the smaller shells for the hermit crabs. We also found a brain coral.

This is an unplanned trip. We reached the place in the afternoon. Under the hot tropical sun, without sunblock. Now I feel hot. My skin is burning. So next time, we'll go either in the morning or in the late afternoon. The former is better as the cliff would provide some shade.

Eastbourne
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eastbourne
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/South_Downs

Twelve Apostles
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Twelve_Apostles_(Victoria)

Successfully made a cottage pie.

A cottage pie is a shepherd's pie with beef. To make one, one need minced beef and mashed potatoes. Don't bother to ask for measurement. I never measure. I never bothered to give measurement when I share my recipe. Once, I prepared macaroni soup with my roommate, well actually by myself, while my roommate was busy with his stuffs. He is a good cook to, but he's more into baking. He baked some cakes for me. Assuming he knows how to cook, I didn't bother to put measurements when sharing my recipe. He loves the macaroni soup which is a modified recipe I got from my Filipina aunt.

"May I have the recipe?'
"Sure, why not!"

A moment later.

"Hey, where are the measurements?"
"Huh?? I thought you were watching me cooking. I don't really measure the ingredients. I reckon that you saw how much I put in the ingredients"

The thought of him baking makes me realized, bakers always measure their ingredients, while cook just measure by eye... and tongue.

And back to the cottage pie.

I sauteed some diced onion and crushed garlic. My aunt always reminds us to all the garlic later as overcooked garlics are bitter. Saute' until fragrant. Then I added some minced beef. And some yoghurt later. I let them simmer until reduced. Then I add some carrot wedges and continue simmering. Don't overcook the carrots. It will get mushy. Remember you still need to bake them.

As for the mashed potatoes, I'll just scrub the potatoes and boil until tender. I don't peel, they can get soggy if peeled before boiling. After they are tender, mash them in the ricer, add some butter and salts. Mix.

In the pie pan, put the minced beef filling and cover with the mash potatoes. Pop it in the oven until done. It's done when the mash potatoes are golden brown. Et voila!

See, I didn't mention any cups, pinch or grams. No time mentioned too. Well, nobody measures their ingredients in this region. Recipes are handed down by mentoring. Probably, in the past, nobody had measuring cups or doesn't know how to read and write. Even if they can read and write, it's better to supervise and teach at the same time. First hand experience, hands on learning.

(Well, if you're an agak-agak* cook like myself, you'll figure the measurements yourself, don't bother ask as I really don't measure my ingredients)

*literally means guessing. the term agak agak is best described in this article http://articles.latimes.com/1994-11-25/food/fo-1263_1_malay-cooking or this video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1UjzXJcxr8k

Ricer is a contraption to rice potatoes
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Potato_ricer

The 'de facto' pork capital... and flying pigs!

This small city should pork capital as its nickname. Like Chicago's Windy City or New York's Big Apple. Porks galore! Unfortunately, I can't eat pork.

This small city is probably the birthplace of barbecued pork establishments/stalls. The locals call these stalls 'Texas'. Nope! Nobody greets Howdy!, nobody wears Stetsons, but we have oil.

Yesterday my brother had pork stewed in herbal tea for dinner. It's so fragrant, it's tempting. God help me!

And this afternoon, we had dessert in a cute food and drink establishment. They do serve pork but we were full after having a good breakfast of noodle in pumpkin and yam gravy. So we only ordered for drinks. I had shaved iced while my brother ordered some herbal tea and tapioca pudding.

We had a glance through the menu. Among them are 'PORK THROTTLE'! Imagine flying a helicopter with pork throttle. Imagine watching pigs star in Airwolf. Or Airpig. (yeah while imagining pigs flying helicopters, the Airwolf theme song is playing in my mind)

Maybe the person in charge of writing the menu is dyslexic, or it's just a typo error. Or maybe it's really a throttle. Too bad, my brother was full and didn't order those throttles. Anyway, my shaved ice was awesome! The palm sugar, a perfect combination of saltiness and bitterness. I would definitely come to this place for their shaved ice.



http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Airwolf

The 'air pocket' bridge

There's one particular bridge near our house. 2 days ago, it's the only bridge linking the new township to the city centre until a new bridge to the by-pass completed yesterday.

I call this bridge the 'air-pocket' bridge. When the township first opened, the road on which the bridge is, was a single carriageway. But as the township grows bigger, it's dual carriageway to alleviate the jam. So, a new bridge was built with the new carriageway. The air pocket bridge is the older one, the city bound bridge. (physically, there seems to be only one bridge as both bridges are less than a metre apart. The new bridge is more of an extension to the old one)

Driving on the bridge at 80 km/h is quite fun. Especially towards the end of the bridge. It's quite old so some of the earthwork subsides making the bridge more like a table edge instead of a ramp. The car would literally fly. Imagine the cover/poster of Taxi (film). And the sudden drop, that's why I call it the air pocket bridge. And if I'm alone driving, I would pretend I'm on an aeroplane

"Ladies and gentlemen, we are about to experience some turbulence. Please return to your seat"

or

"The fasten your seat belt sign is turned on, please return to your seat"

But, air pocket are sudden unlike a turbulence. The above announcement is usually for 'regular' turbulence. Nobody knows when or where an air pocket is.

Taxi poster
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Taxi_%281998_film%29

Air pocket
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clear-air_turbulence

I wish I could... ... ... ... play the guitar. Hahahaha

I don't know how to play any musical instrument. Maraca maybe.

I like this guy.

Okay

https://www.youtube.com/user/iampaulritter

Quite tired, as I went shopping with my brother.

PTSD? ewwwww! How did you get that?

 Apparently, PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder) and STD (sexually transmitted diseases or sometimes VD*) look alike to a dyslexic. Unless that particular dyslexic have PTSD.

That's a joke. Although some friends of mine look at me in horror when I told them I have PTSD.
"Are you okay? When did this happen?"

PTSD patients are considered mild I would say as long as nothing triggers us. Although there are many degrees of PTSD.

Can PTSD be cured? I doubt that. I would say nobody understands how it is to live with PTSD even a psychiatrist. You have to have it then you would understand how it feels to have sleepless night, recurring nightmare, being a bit paranoid, the stigma, anxiety, tachycardia (heart beating faster)... and those are taxing. Leading us to tiredness, and repeat. The whole vicious cycle. Unless you are surrounded by a good support group, it's not really treatable. I'm not sure about ecstasy though. Never tried one although it sounds promising in studies.

Living with typical Asians wouldn't help with PTSD. If an American soldier with financial support from the government could have gone berserk, what more to say about stigmatized Asians PTSD 'survivor'. Once I asked my psychotherapist about group therapy, she seems to not agree. Maybe she knows which therapy is better. She opted for CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy). I could tell, CBT is not suitable for somebody who thinks a lot. I would say I think a lot. I even thought it's ridiculous not to think when somebody told me to meditate and keep my mind empty.

So I doubt my PTSD could be cured with SSRI's (selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor, an anti-depressant) and CBT alone. One need at a support system. We need empathy not sympathy. I have sympathies as it patronizing. Sympathy is a euphemism to patronizing. That is why I think a support group and group therapy would help. At least we know we are not alone.

By saying that SSRIs and CBTs are not effective, one might think I have poor insight on my ailment. Non compliance too maybe. How would you expect me to be honest with my psychotherapist and psychiatrist when they are both my lecturer? I would prefer to have somebody else to help me through PTSD as I do have some dark secrets that I wouldn't want to divulge to my lecturer. I prefer somebody who aren't judgmental. There's always a hesitancy to open to them. But the dean still think that the best solution.

Don't get me wrong. I like my psychiatrist/lecturer and psychotherapist/lecturer. I just can open much to them.

Sometimes, I wish the psychiatrist and psychotherapist had PTSD so that they could understand us better.

Stigma in this region is quite high. One fine day, before I succumb into PTSD, a psychiatrist asked us would one prefer to be warded (institutionalized) or as out-patient? Most of my colleague opted to be treated as an out-patient. I beg to differ, i would prefer to be in the ward with other mental patient than to be stigmatized in outside world. Dr Gunn (not related to Tim Gunn of Runway Project) gave me a pen as a reward. I don't know why he reward me with a pen. Maybe because of my opinion on stigmatization.

Maybe that one of the reason why I watch police procedural TV series. There's always somebody with PTSD. At least I know that I'm not alone.

And finally, a quote from Aristotle "No great mind has ever existed without a touch of madness". I think, all psychiatric hospitals or wards put a billboard in front of their establishment with these words. Imagine a large billboard in like this
"Welcome to XXX Psychiatric Hospital, home of possible great minds."
A a quote from Aristotle follows.  




P/S
Please pardon my abbreviation. And actually, I hate abbreviations. They can be something different.
CBD to me is Central Business District not Common Bile Duct of Continuous Catheter Drainage
SOB is Son of Bitch not Shortness of Breath

Luckily I'm not Singaporean. There's even a Wikipedia page dedicated for Singaporean abbreviations
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Singapore_abbreviations

PTSD
http://www.ptsdalliance.org/
http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/post-traumatic-stress-disorder-ptsd/index.shtml

*VD - venereal diseases in hospital. vacant dirty in hospitality

isn't CBT Cock Ball Torture too? hahaha

Why I watch reality show...

Most TV series I watch are generally police procedural. The Mentalist, Graceland, White Collar, Death in Paradise, Miss Fisher Mysteries, Haven, Grimm,  and the list goes on. Currently, I am hooked into watching Motive, Other than police procedural, I'm also into legal drama, not heavy one though. Would love to watch Law and Order but I kinda think it's heavy albeit fun to watch. I watched Eli Stone and Drop Dead Diva. I know it sounds cheesy but, Drop Dead Diva is quite accurate when it comes to law. Maybe that stemmed from my love towards watching Legally Blond or maybe I'm just an archetypal Libra.

Back to reality show, I can't help but to watch ANTM. I would love to watch makeover shows but let's face it, it hard to get those shows here, those are not free to air, and not in DVD format (I prefer DVD because I can watch them at my own time). Well, to compensate, there's always This Old House in YouTube.

ANTM for me is just a light reality show compared to the Kardashian whom I wish I could just throw them into the Pacific, maybe I just envied them. I watch ANTM maybe because of my interest in fashion just like watching This Old House because I'm interested in architecture.

Damn I talk a lot. Back to the question why I watch reality TV. Well, it's fun to watch people making stupid things. They are funny. Sometimes, it's full of drama. 2 girls fighting. And what I like most is the chopping board. ........ you're still in the running to become the next top model.

The chopping board, makes me think that live still goes on even after being eliminated. Sometimes, when I'm in deep shit, I'll imagine myself on the chopping board. And most times, I would imagine that my life is just a reality show.

Once, we're posted to a town by the river to complete our Public Health posting. Since it's a 3 months posting accommodation are provided. 11 guys in a house. It's stressful at times to live with 10 other guys in a 4 bedroom house. Whose turn to shower to whose turn to do the cleaning. Watching a lot of ANTM tells me to stay out from any argument, keep your place clean and nobody would alienate you. And I am always the Switzerland among the 10 UN nation. Minding my own business, except, I was elected to lead the group in some aspects. So it's partial Switzerland then. Some would disagree with my decisions, so there was some friction. Again in ANTM, when you're leading, just keep cool, choose wisely and just agree to disagree.

Another thing, expect some backstabbing. So, when I'm leading, I imagine myself as Alexandria Everett in cycle 16. If I'm not, Alexandria in cycle 17. If you follow ANTM, you would notice the difference between Alexandria in the 16th cycle and the all-star cycle. In the 16th cycle, she seems bitchy. Yeah seems, because the others are jealous of her and starts to call her names, yeah that's you Brittani. In the all-star cycle, she's sweeter. Nonetheless, I vouch for Lexi in both cycles.

Sometimes, I can be as cranky as Molly in cycle 16. She minds her own business though and keep to herself most of the time, so less friction although her nickname was Angry Molly. When my colleague alienate me because of my weirdness I would imagine myself as the handsome Chris H (cycle 20) and the one alienate me the most as Marvin, the bigmouth. Yeah, I would prefer to be Chris H as he is always being misunderstood just like me. We talk a lot but we still harbour deep feeling. We just don't show our feeling.

Lately, I watch Genuine Ken on YouTube. Well I like Chris Holscher more than the others. He don't really call the others names and shy. Aren't shy men cute? (And I feel like castrating myself for making this statement). And why I like guys named Chris with surname starts with H? Just a coincidence maybe. or maybe both are my age, so we 80's babies should stick together.

And no, I don't only watch girly reality show, I watch Survivors and Amazing Race too. I would watch if it's on the telly. Or any house makeover.

(p/s Pardon me for the delay on posting my cookie baking experience, I need a second opinion. My chocolate cookie taste okay, but I need my brother's opinion. To me, it's not as chewy as Famous Amos, but still better (or the same) than regular chocolate cookies)


 

Brilliant people can have dyslexia too...

Yesterday, while talking with my oldest bestie on the phone, I told her one of the reason I quit medical school is dyslexia. I have mild dyslexia but it can get worse under extreme stress.

"Really! Impossible! You are very smart. Dyslexic can't be as smart as you..."
A common misconception. I would say 95% wouldn't believe if I say I had dyslexia. But after some through explanation, she sees it. Pony is my considered oldest best friend. We've been friends for 20 years now. I've known some friends before her but we don't keep in touch. So, Pony is the oldest friend that I have whom I still keep in touch with. We met when we were 6/7 years old. She's my classmate.

So I explained "Remember when we were in Standard 1, I am just an average student? I still remember I'm in the 14th placing in the class. You are among the top 10." "I have spelling difficulties no matter how hard I memorize"

Still not convinced "In Standard 3, you called me creative, so the first person to teach me that long word is you" "You had to explain the word because I'm not good with long words"

"Yea, you're a visual learner..." was her reply

"I am more to visual. I made my own charts, my own diagram and mind maps. And the first 20 elements in the periodical table, We had a unique mnemonics"

The mnemonics was a created by my other good friend and I. What makes it unique, it's a parody of out vice principal and some classmates.

"I have to learn how to control the words and letters from becoming fuzzy and dancing. Reading cursive letters is a hell, that is why my notes are in block letters"

And our biology teacher always compliment my note, not because it's clean and tidy, because I write in block letters and it's easy to read. When reading cursive writings, the letters seems to play skipping rope together.

"Hey! look on the bright side. Maybe it's a good thing that I quit medicine. At least, I won't be sued if I write a wrong prescription.. hahahaha"

Alexander Graham Bell, Albert Einstein, Richard Branson; they are also dyslexic according to www.dyslexia.com (link below) In that list only 2 are doctors... well actually surgeons. Well surgeon read less and watch more. They are more into visual. And Surgery is a subject that one have too see to understand.

And most dyslexics are good in business. sports, and arts.

http://www.dyslexia.com/famous.htm  

Baking nad chatting.

Now I realize that I spelled and as nad... damn dyslexia!

After sending my mother to the airport, realizing that I would be alone at home, I thought I can do anything I want to. Running naked, jumping out from the roof or mezzanine level or go window shopping. My window shopping turns into serious shopping. What can I say, I am metrosexual... we love shopping (actually it's also an excuse when we guys have shopping frenzy like girls... just say "I'm a metrosexual", one would stop questioning you)

In my list of to see is a candy thermometer, ice packs, yup I still can't see one here and some groceries. So naturally, I'll stop at a kitchen supplies store to find a candy thermometer. 38 bucks? Okay maybe next time. And I continue to browse through the store. Then I saw a parchment paper. A reusable parchment paper. 10 bucks, hell yeah! (that how cheapskate Asians are) So I bought one. And an idea came to me. I came to a realization, I can just mess up the kitchen because my mother is away. So I planned to bake some cookies.

After buying half of the items, I drive through a nearby bazaar, my actual birthplace. Some of my friends houses are there. So I pass by my oldest bestie's house at Ginger street. Next I texted her if she is here.

We exchange texts and eventually, we wanted to have a chat, via phone. All my ingredients are ready and I called her. We chated throughout my baking process. That why, mobile phones have hands free setting. So I baked and chatted. Kinda fun...

So I would like to thank my bestie to 'accompany' me throughout the baking process.

My next post would probably about my baking.

Insya-alright, I'll post the pictures too.

*Insya-alright - that what my bestie said... lol its a portmanteau of Insyaallah and everything gonna be alright. Insyaallah is Arabic for God's willing

Bye for now, I need to see my cookies. Crossing fingers

UM... unaccompanied mothers?

I was sending my mother to the airport. It's just a small but busy airport. It caters rural flights, domestic flights and some regional flights. By regional flights, international destination. I live in a small nation, one can fly to a foreign country under 3 hours.

My mother is quite clumsy when it comes to checking in. Personally, I prefer the self check in kiosk but there is none for this particular airline in this airport. There are 2 self check in kiosk for another airlines, a low cost airline but none for the full service airline. By self check in, I can choose my preferred seat and just drop my luggage at the baggage drop.

Being clumsy, I helped my mother with checking in. So the clerks asked "Who's going?". I replied "My mother...".  "Oh, I thought you're flying along because if so, I need to have a look at you ID" the clerk said. "Nope, just my mum... UM... unaccompanied mother" and then we had a big laugh.

My mother laughed too but a few minutes later, she asked me, "Are you flirting with her?"
"Who?" I asked back.
"The clerk...".
Hey, I just wanted to break the monotony of checking in process. Don't get me wrong. By the way, I'm Libra... always flirting or always seems like flirting. it's in my sign. A Libran always looks flirty even when we don't flirt.

I object!!!

Well, I normally don't talk much about politics because I  think that they are absurd and nonsense. Politicians get richer, lay citizens gets poorer. They can give you 101 ways to fight jam or water shortage without even experience the citizens hardship. Well, Mr. Twain seems to agree with me (or actually I agree with Mr. Twain)

“Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.”

― Mark Twain


Today let's compare our opposition party with opposition party in other parts of the world.

As a Canadiophile, it is always a pleasure to learn about Canada. The fastest way is to study their citizenship guidebook and test yourself with their citizenship test. So I took an online citizenship quiz just to test my knowledge.

One of the question is "What is the role of the Opposition parties". The correct answer is "To oppose or try to improve government proposals". It is in their citizenship guidebook too. It's good to let their future citizens know that, voting for an opposition party is not a bad thing. And leader of the opposition party lives in the official house. Leader of opposition party lives in an official home! So, it's quite right to say, the ruling party and opposition party have the same right in Canada.

Well, over here, opposition party are viewed as bad, or unlawful, or (insert negative verb). National TV is controlled by the governing party, so most political news or advert are quite bias. And some of the civil servants are afraid to vote for the opposition.

Opposition party are supposed to keep the ruling party in check, And to protest any unconstitutional or unjust act done by ruling party. Otherwise, the governing party would turn into a dictatorship or totalitarian.

If this is too hard to understand, just remember yin and yang. You need both for balance.

Nope, I am not saying the ruling party is bad or opposing party is good. Just pointing out that, how different is our (the majority) attitude towards opposition and why we need an opposition party. And how unfair is our political situation.

I just think it's funny, that all. So don't shoot me!

(well, that unethical professor who taught me medical ethics, he always 'brainwash' us to vote for the ruling party... problem with elderly Asians, they think they know too much, and they think the younger generations are stupid... so called eating more salt)

The quiz that I tried
http://citizenshipcounts.ca/quiz

The official residence of Leader of Opposition party
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stornoway_%28residence%29
And on the list of residents, the current and some former Prime Ministers

Worth reading
http://www.answers.com/Q/What_are_the_responsibilities_of_the_Official_Opposition

*eating more salt means had live longer and have more experience. Another way to say, don't argue with me.

And what I write is a mere observation. If the reader thinks that the information above are incorrect, please comment

Parting with them is like parting with invisible best friend...

Shabbat shalom.

It's normal for children to have imaginary friends. And so believe, bogeyman are 'abandoned' imaginary best friend. That's what my cousin Abigail told me. or maybe it's from a Disney movie? Don't Look Under The Bed I think? Or maybe both. How about adult with imaginary friend? That Day-O...

I have 2 imaginary friends. Yes! have as in present tense. And I'm 27. One is Ben and the other Carlos. Actually, my imaginary friends are not as clear as most think or as movie depicts. I can't describe them physically. Although I can't 'see' them, I can feel their presence. They help me with puns which keep me laughing, they played in the car backseat when I'm driving (imagine Alanis' Ironic video clip). They are present only when I am alone. I even have an imaginary pet. Actually, it's my late dog, not exactly my dog, but I fed, bathe and walked the dog. He was a good hiking companion. He's dead but I had good memories together. Denial, maybe but I'm not crazy.

So one day, my mother caught me talking by myself. This freaks her out. I mean, I'm the craziest one and I used to see a psychiatrist (for my PTSD, ok) She really freaked out. Come on... I even talk in my sleep. And I talk every time. I'm just talkative. Because I'm a Libra.

Some said, adult with imaginary friends are creative, some says it's a manifestation of depression. Well, there's a thin line between creativity and craziness. van Gogh, Munch to name a few. We 'so-called crazy' people colour the normal black and white world. Without crazy people, the world is just a mundane place. So be thankful to us.


Don't Look Under The Bed
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Don%27t_Look_Under_the_Bed

Day-O
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Day-O_%28film%29

Ironic by Alanis Morissette
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jne9t8sHpUc

Just to back up that we Libra talk too much, or you can ask any Astrologer...
http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20131007093809AA6EmqI

Tried and tested (tasted?) Greek yoghurt salad dressing

The idea of eating raw egg yolk disgust me. No doubt, homemade mayonnaise are way better than store bought mayonnaise but if I'm the one preparing the mayonnaise, I wouldn't enjoy eating them. Ignorance is bliss. And, raw egg yolk mayonnaise spoil faster.

But, that doesn't mean I lose my battle with store bought mayonnaise. I don't hate store bought mayonnaise, I just don't like the consistency. If I have to use them I would modify them by adding vegetable oil and lemon juice to make them runnier. After all, lemon juice and olive oil are the main ingredients. My late cousin, Estelle mix them with sweetened condensed milk. That's too sweet for me. 

To mix oil and water, one needs emulsifier to emulsify them. Emulsification is when oil droplets are suspended in water, or in this case lemon juice. Emulsifiers need to be both hydrophilic and hydrophobic. 

I'm not sure whether yoghurts are emulsifier. But they taste and feel similar to mayonnaise. Greek yoghurt are sour and creamy. With that in mind, I mix Greek yoghurt with vegetable oil. As yoghurt are naturally sour, I don't think adding lemon juice is a good idea. So I mixed both ingredients and season with salt and pepper... et voila. A delicious salad dressing.

I've read this recipe many times before but I was skeptical. Even before mixing in oil into the yoghurt, I felt reluctant. It's a leap of faith. Well, considering Greek yoghurt cost 12 buck a tub which is quite expensive. 

Now I'm a convert. No more sugar in my salad. Good for low carb diet. 

(p/s I'm gonna find our yoghurt maker in the pantry later. Thinking of make my own yoghurt and strain them. Greek yoghurt are actually strained plain yoghurt. Do store bought yoghurt have live active lactobacillus  in them? Because I'm thinking of using them as starter)

Coincidence?

3 notable incident involving Boeing 777 in Malaysia Airlines fleet.

9M-MRG, 9M-MRO, 9M-MRD.

The whole 777 are registered 9M-MR followed by a third alphabet in alphabetical order. 9M-MRA being the oldest in the fleet, followed by 9M-MRB and so on. 9M-MRA is a record holder for the longest non-commercial non-stop flight.

Let's call each aircraft by their last letter, A,B,C and so on. So 9M-MRG is G, 9M-MRO as O and the ill fated 9M-MRD, D. What does the three spell? GOD.

I'm not pious or religious person. I'm just amused by the coincidence.

More coincidence? Let's look into the ill-fated 9M-MRD. First flown on the 17th July 1997, crashed 17 years later on the 17th July 2014 while bearing the flight number MH17.

I'm just pointing the coincidence in these incidence. Don't shoot me

Guillotine for eyelids,

Ever wonder how to get sexy eyelashes. Do you envy Ashton Kutcher or Elizabeth Taylor's eyelashes. Guy with curly eyelashes are handsome too. I've met this Indian guy with nice curly eyelashes. He is so cute, I mean his eyelashes are. And calling other men cute doesn't make someone gay...

So, the metrosexual in me keeps on urging me to curl my eyelashes, with eyelid guillotine aka eyelash curler. It's not surprising to find concealers, eyeliners eyelash curlers, nail buffers, mascara or bronzer in a metrosexual's vanity bag. We are not drag queen, we just like to look and dress better. Maybe we are a bit insecure but we are bold and brave enough to use girly stuffs.

With eyelash curler that I have for years, (the rubbers are still soft though) I curl my eyelashes. I even search for YouTube video. It's scary. If you're a pro, there's no need to look for YouTube tutorial, but I'm just scared.

1, 2,3.... ouch. Shit! I guillotined my eyelid. Second attempt... same. Eyelash curlers are scary to mere men but not to metrosexual men... as I said, we're braver and bolder.

After umphteen attempt, I finally got the look I like. However, it's not obvious because of my hooded eye. Talking about hooded eye, I have love hate relationship with my hooded eye. Sometimes it's makes me look fierce. But sometimes I'm grateful, because it gives an illusion of me being serious. Men looks better if they seems serious. And Sean O'Pry have hooded eyes too. So does James Franco.

End up not curling my eyelashes unless I put on some falsies. But that's to RuPaul drag queen. Looking good and feeling gorgeous...

(p/s Rusty Joiner have hooded eyes too right?)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tyG3MP6FebQ

Qalb and qalb

As a non-Muslim, Arabic is not a compulsory subject in school. Even for the Muslim, it's not compulsory. I wish I had learn Arabic. Arabic is one of the elective subject in our faculty. My friend and I tried to get ourselves enrolled into the Arabic class. We were rejected because we don't know basic Arabic.

In this region, Arabic is always associated with Islamic class. When I told my colleague (non-Muslim) my intention to learn Arabic, their responds were "Are you going to convert to Islam?".

So back to the title. Qalb and qalb. One is heart the other is dog. I didn't know they are homonym until I attended a talk in college. The speaker said something about love. It leads to how couples say their feeling. And he rectified on the proper pronunciation of Heart in Arabic. "You have to pronounce it correctly, otherwise you'll say "Your love is in my dog" to your boyfriend/girlfriend.

Arabic and Hebrew are in my list of foreign language I wish to learn... even basic Arabic and Hebrew.

My best friend, who's quite fluent in Arabic (she's just being humble by saying her Arabic is rusty) help me sometimes.

I know Yom in Hebrew is day and Ain in Hebrew is eye. Well, it's almost similar to Arabic. My bestie told me in Arabic, it's Youm and Ain. And she would say "Of course, both are Semite language... and anti-Semitic is sometimes a misnomer. Calling an Arab anti-Semitic is non-sense"

Some of Arabic word/name I know

Saif means sword, Saifullah means God's sword.
Abdul means servant, Abdullah means servant of God
Nur is light. Nur ain is light of the eye...

Once there was a patient named Salihin. My friends think that it's a nice name. So I verified myself "It means faithful right?" They replied "Something like that, I'm not sure... Hey, how do you know?" I know Salih means faithful because our version of O come o ye faithful is called Mari Orang Saleh.

I can't tell you the translations are accurate. I don't know much Arabic. So correct me if I'm wrong.

By the way. my qalb is in my qalb... literally. I miss my dog.

And I still, haven't find what I'm looking for...

Today, I went out to the mall to find ice packs. Coleman ice pack to be exact. I need them to make redneck air conditioner. It's warmer here but windier. So I'm thinking of using the ice pack as heat sink. Or if it's cool, I'll use them as ice bath to make nail polish set quicker.

I went to 5 places to find them but alas... In the big city, ice packs are sold at a nearby hypermarket. Which is 5 minutes drive (10 if it's peak hour) away. The same hypermarket here doesn't sell Coleman ice packs.

Perhaps, it's near to the sea and nobody need ice packs. In the big city, the sea is 45 minutes drive away and to get fresh fish, one have to drive to the fishing villages by the sea. Here, the sea is less than 10 minutes drive, so one can just shop for fresh fish just like shopping for vegetables.

And, over here, the seafood purists are against storing fish in ice or it would alter the fish taste (less sweet). So nobody need an ice pack here.

I'm considering doing my own with radiator coolant and used container.

Dyslexia and puns

I am dyslexic. I have problem spelling since I was 6. I spelt MILO as OLIM. Maybe partly because I am a left hander, so I am living in my mirror image self. ( not 100% though, because I am not having situs inversus*)

There are strong correlation between dyslexia and left-handers. Something about how our brains are wired. Genetically, lefties are prone to get schizophrenia.  Southpaw are also easily scared... that explains my PTSD. Some of our craziness is caused by our parents and teachers. They tried to 'correct' us. Spanking, hitting just because we use our 'dirty' hand to write (learn). So excuse us for our craziness. Stubborn. Poor handwriting, although my Biology teacher praises my handwriting. I write in block letters so it;s legible, this leads to my rivalry with a fellow classmate. It wasn't me who started it. He is just jealous and starts to verbally abuse me by calling me fat and wrote bad poem about me in our yearbook. Asian 'kiasuness'.

Being dyslexic is sometimes an amusement to my friends. I pronounced SCULPTURE as SCLUPTURE one day and a roar of laughter followed. Adequate is pronounced as AQUEDATE. Blame it on my fascination to architecture. I imagine adequate as something with arches and channels water across valleys. I know adequate means enough, sufficient but that's how I see words. Blame it on brain lateralization.

However, dyslexia drives me to improve my language. When in doubt, I'll just look it up in the internet. Forvo... wikipedia... grammatist... It is said that dyslexics can't understand puns. Really? I like puns. It's true initially, it's hard for us to understand. When I was 10, a friend on mine asked? "Why is the graveyard noisy?" "Because of the coffin'". I took it literally that the coffin talks. Over here, caskets are preferable over coffins. And some doesn't even need a coffin for burial. Back then, I took things literally.

The first time I understand puns was when I am 17. I was reading the Oxford Activator dictionary. It's under jokes. The dictionary gave an example of a joke. "When is a door not a door?" When it is ajar". I laughed alone. When my roommate asked me for a joke for him to tell his English class, I gave him this. But he doesn't really thinks it a joke. So it's not necessary for a non-dyslexic to understand puns better than dyslexics.

Again, not everybody in this region understand puns.


*situs inversus
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Situs_inversus

I like to sing...

I like to sing. And I sing in foreign language. This morning, I sang Nkosi sikelel' iAfrika and Aotearoa and a bit of French O Canada. I live with my mother and she said my singing gave her headache. Imagine listening to my E Ihowa atua or my Yizwa imithandazo yethu or Il sait porter la croix or Uit de blouw van onse hemel. Imagine listening to at least 5 foreign language. Imagine a person cackling in Maori, Zulu, Afrikaan and French for hours. 

Thank God, I don't sing Hatikva...

And I am about to "Kol od balevav penima... Nefesh Jehudi homiyah....

Monster High Doll

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d8zHxSZZwlE&list=UUiFpf-gmGbpL-D1ito62uZg

Finally, I got to see the end product.

Ironman packing microwaveable popcorn.

I got my best friend exited when I brought microwaveable popcorn to her workplace. She is so exited, she waited in front of the microwave, watching the popcorn pop in the bag. It's kinda like watching the laundry spinning in the front loading washing machine. You wait and asked yourself, "what next?". The anticipation. Just like my 'exitedness' to watch this video. Something to remind me of those good memories I had.

And it's always fun to work with Mr. Carter.  

This Old House marathon...

Watching one of my favourite TV show. Yup, I am not your regular guy. I don't watch Running Man, I don't watch mainstream TV show. I watch American house remodeling TV show. I prefer watching sweaty DILF's remodelling houses than watching absurdly cute plastic surgery face Korean men. (Sorry for the stereotype, I never watch Korean drama. All I know is they look too good too be true)

Did is call Roger, Richard, Tommy, Norm and Kevin DILF's? Whoops! Hey! I meant I prefer watching regular men doing regular things. I like Tommy's tips and techniques. Finding a stud, (frame stud, not stud stud) just by knocking the wall. That's akin to doctor's percussion. Doctor's percuss patient's chest to look for liquid accumulation or mass in the lungs. Tommy percuss old houses wall to find stud.

Norm is an excellent carpenter. He had his own show on replicating antique pieces. He is also to coolest one. He's more of a father figure among all these men.

Kevin, is the host. And I quite envy his job. Playing with power tools with his colleague. Kevin is quite cute too. I just wish I am as cute as him. Just kidding.

Richard is always up to date with his plumbing and HVAC technology. And a great diagnostician. He applies doctor's differential diagnoses to plumbing and HVAC.

Roger is great with landscaping. I like when he design retaining walls and patio, always beautiful. He also lays brick walkway, built fire pits, dry well, french drain and hardscapings.

But one thing that makes me nervous. They seldom wear PPE's. It's quite scary to watch Norm cut woods without guard, Tommy ripping dry walls without helmets and mask and all. Or am I just too cautious? Or is my imagination too vivid?

However, looking at the results, it's worth watching all those things. It's like an ugly duckling transforming into a beautiful swan. Still worth watching even though the building codes and techniques here are different than in North America.

DILF - daddy I like to xxxx (well, aren't most sweating men doing macho things are?)
HVAC - heating ventilation air conditioning
PPE - personal protective equipment

OCD of just ODD?

I do have slight problem with touching and personal space. Just ask my best friend. I would feel awkward touching other people, let alone hugging.

Sometimes, I just feel guilty touching other people. Part of it is a result of studying medicine. Healthcare workers are potential germ spreader. It's a well known fact. It is strongly advised to wash one hands before and after touching a patient. It's not that they're germaphobe, or disgusted with patients. So, sometimes I refuse to shake hands because I don't want to spread my germs to you. I might pick my nose, scratch my butt, or bite my nails. Don't get offended.

Another reason is partly religious. It's also a known fact that among Muslims, non family of the opposite sex are not allowed to touch. Non-muhrim*. Although I am not a Muslim, I do practise it. However not every body adhere strictly to this custom. So, sometimes I am a pain in the ass to Muslim lady toll attendant. I would avoid at all cost to touch her. I would apologise if I do touch them accidentally. Sorry, toll lady. I just want to avoid you from commit sin. If I must touch, I'll ask for permission with presence of a chaperone.

Am I having OCD or just odd... nope, I'm just being responsible.

I should just wear gloves next time...

*  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mahram

Saatchi & Saatchi and silicone spatula...

To someone who cooks and bakes, silicone spatula is a wonderful kitchen utensil. It scrapes better, it doesn't scratch and it's flexible. I use them to mix and also to flip food in the frying pan. When mixing any batter, the silicone spatula is superior than other spatula in scraping the edge of mixing bowl.

I had one cute red spatula which I use very often. So in 9 months, it started to tear a bit. The small tear soon become a big tear and rendered the spatula useless. It's my favourite, the size is just fine, so I screamed. I told my friend this incident. and she replied, "That's so Nigella Lawson". For those who don't know, Nigella Lawson's kitchen is the envy of most women (and some men too!). It's complete with everything a cook/baker needs. So I responded her text "That's so Saatchi and Saatchi" I wish!

Nigella Lawson's ex hubby was one of the Saatchi brothers. Well, I knew about the advertising agency from a British Airways advert. The face. One of my all time favourite advertisement. The other is KLM swan advert.


BA Face advert
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/British_Airways_face_advertisement

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NAcBsSzjiUo

KLM swan advert
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SlPTkO9TGXI

Christmas mood...

In our lovely state, it's not surprising to find people of all creed and race live in harmony. Better than our nation. Well our state is distinct from other states in the nation because of our history. It is so unique. I would say our state is unique, it is akin to Quebec in Canada. We use different language, our culture is different and cessation is one of the hotly discussed topic. Our state is also the largest, much like Quebec, the largest province in Canada (Although Nunavut is larger, Nunavut is a territory... Imagine how big would Northwest Territory be before it splits)

This morning, my mother and I went to 2 Muslim owned business. One is an optometrist the other is a restaurant. What surprises me is both establishment is in Christmas mood. The optometrist decorated his shop with Christmas trees, reindeer and Santa Clause. Also hanging on the wall is an Islamic calligraphy, the Shahadah is think. A bit funny, but somehow. To some this is conflicting. A Shahadah and Santa Claus in the same room. It's not a big issue here unlike in other states.

A few doors away from the optometrist is the restaurant. It's not decorated with Christmas decorations but Arthur Christmas is playing on the TV. Christmas mood is everywhere including in Muslim owned establishment. 

Although ethnically diverse, we treat each others like brothers and sisters. We don't allow racism in this region. I hope these dynamics would continue for many generations to come.  

But I also hope Christians, being the majority in this land, would do the same to our Muslim brethren. Accept the diversity in our state. After all we are like a big family. Acceptance. Accepting one another is one of the key to a harmonious nation. 

Overcast...

The weather here is dynamic. This morning, it was overcast. It closely resembles the cover of Pinkerton. The one with Japanese houses blanketed in snow.

And now it's hot. Hollywood hot. Although it's hot, you can hear the thunders clapping in distance. Inland.

And I need a rest after donating more than 1 pint of blood yesterday. Donating seems to be a misnomer. They gave me a pack of soybean milk. And a 4 bucks coupon to redeem at the cafeteria. I didn't use the coupon because it's supposed to be a donation. I should have given my coupon somebody who needs them more yesterday. I'm too exited to have a new booklet and that thought slipped off my head.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pinkerton_(album)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marine_layer

Nkosi Sikelel iAfrika

Today I found the best rendition, a duet

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YzWnxYjALQ0

Haylea Hounsom's

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v9kajLhrX6I

And gospelized karaokeized version. Kinda funny but still easy to my ears. Well, what can I say when the song itself is beautiful

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N2Q6pa5cSSo

Catch me if you can

In my life I have accidentally fool a lot of people. I say accidentally as human like to assume and hold to their assumption religiously. Well kinda like the title's namesake, but less malicious.

The first incident I could remember is in college. In college, I took Biology as my core subject. There are also Physics and Accounting. So basically, one can classify a student as biology major or physics major or economy/accounting major. In our second semester, every students are required to do a research for English class. For the research, one have to do/distribute their questionnaire. For the sample, one have to distribute the questionnaire according to the percentage of students. Overall distribution of student is roughly, 40% Biology, 40% Physics and 20% Economics. So our sample should represent these figure. Say if one group is to have 100 samples, 40 questionnaires are to be answered by Biology students, 40 for Physics and 20 questionnaires to Economics student. Finding an Economic respondent is quite hard.

So one fine day, I was sitting in the library to cool myself down. That is the only facilities on the campus with conditioned air. While waiting, I read a book on Marketing. Typical Asian students would not read something outside their scope of study. I can say, I am the unconventional one. The library is also a good place to find respondents. A few minutes after lazing myself in the library, A cute girl asked me. "Excuse me? Can you spare some time to answer our questionnaire?" I agreed. After I completed the questionnaire, I marked 'Biology' in the Major section.

Upon seeing this, the girls thought that I was pulling their leg. "I think you tick the wrong box, I assume you're an accounting student. Never mind, we'll correct it latter". Apparently, they have enough Biology and Physics respondent and need to find about 30 Economics respondent. "No, I am a Biology major. You can look into my student's ID if you are still doubtful? Science students ID starts with 'S' while Accounting starts with an 'A'. "Oh sorry, we thought you are Economics major since you are reading Marketing book." I felt sorry for them too. They have wasted 1 set of questionnaire and their time. They should have asked me earlier.

Second incident is during an Expo. It is an expo to showcase houses. As always, my arsenal when attending an expo is to dress Business casual. One house design  attracted me. It's a 2 and 1/2 storey semi detached house model. With wet and dry kitchen, 2 Master bedrooms and 3 bedrooms. All with en suite bathroom. 2 rooms shared a bathroom. It's called a Jack and Jill bathroom. The house also features clerestory windows for natural lighting and ventilation. The clerestory window suits the butterfly roof. After hearing 'butterfly roof', 'clerestory window' and 'Jack and Jill bathroom', the sales rep start to react coldly. Apparently, she thought that I am an Architect, working for another architecture firm and trying to 'steal' their ideas. I wish I am an Architect... too bad I am not. My knowledge is from reading hundreds of Architecture Digest magazine, Australian House and Gardens, Better Homes and Gardens and other architecture magazine.

The third memorable incident happens in a shipyard. It was during our school trip for our Occupational Health class. First, the shipwright asked the whole class what is a shaft. I'm not that good in explaining things so I made a gesture of propellers with my fingers and cover my forearm with another hand. I meant to say, a shaft is the thing to transmit power from engine (my body) to the propeller (my finger). The shipwright misunderstood my gesture, he said "No, that's the propeller". And the he asked what is a dry dock. "It's dry... " I said. The shipwright then asked the whole class "How to keep the dock dry?"... "Cofferdam!!!" was my replied. "But that dry dock has no cofferdam, Instead the ship has to be pulled to a ramp to expose the hull". He's amazed. Then we went into a tugboat. "Ahoy!!! Can we go up the bridge. On the bridge, I pointed "Is that the sonar? Cool. What is that monitor on our starboard? So the pilot sits here, port" and my 101 questions. Then I asked the shipwright, where is the galley (kitchen), the head (toilet) and the crew's berth (bedroom). If you're into microhomes, you should see the tugboat layout. It optimizes the space. Then, the shipwright gave me a personal tour. And asked me, if my family is in shipping business. Oh I wish I am one of the Onassis family. With nice Greek nose, handsome facial features... and money to burn. "No, my family is not that rich...". After the tour, I met with some welders. I cried in exclamation " IS THAT A PLASMA CUTTER? COOL! HOW MUCH IS ONE?" That amuses my colleague and the driver. An one of the driver jokingly told the class "I think we should leave him here... Maybe in his past life, he works in a shipyard"

That is why, I value my general knowledge. You can share them with strangers. It can be used to break ice if you're talking to someone new. And exchanging ideas is fun. It is also a good tool to flirt. Well, that's how Barney Stintson flirts with girls, except his information is fake. Or kinda like Ted Mosby's modus operandi for hooking up with new girl. Except, he is boring. Wait! Am I like Ted Mosby? Nevermind. I am not into the dating pool anyway.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Catch_Me_If_You_Can

iatrogenic hypovolaemic shock

While being interviewed by the doctor in the blood bank (refer to previous post), she advises me not to do heavy work. Some could faint even though they are regular blood donor or fit. And I blurted out, yup kinda like shock. Doctor induced hypovolaemic shock. But it's unfair to blame the doctor as most doctor would advise against heavy work after donating blood.

We had a laugh. And that why she suspected me as somebody who works in the medical field.

It's not only people working in the medical field, I fooled a shipwright/naval architect too. And even some architect. Kinda like Leo in Catch me if you can movie. More on that later.

Selfie while......... donating blood?

Apparently, you can 'selfie' everywhere... grave yard, in the car while driving, diving, on a long flight, everywhere. You can also do it while you're dressed, in the dressing room or in your birthday suit. The possibilities are endless. Anywhere, wearing anything, all the time, you name it.

So after getting the key to my 'Alfa Romeo', I went to the blood bank in Canada*. While donating blood, my seatmate or cubicle-mate did a selfie. Do you really need to tell the word how you lose 1 pint of blood? Or as an evidence for your leave. (Yup, one can take a half day off after donating blood in this region... not sure about the real Canada though...) Funny thing people do here.

Donating blood is another story. I am naturally talkative. So it's my second nature to chit-chatting with salesperson or a seatmate. I can be a nightmare. It's my way of exchanging ideas. I'm not really an extrovert. So imagine if I were to be a doctor. I'll be the big mouth one. Not sharing gossip, sharing ideas. That is why I always exceed the time limit for viva voce examination.

See, one paragraph just to tell you that I am talkative. Back to the story, the doctor, a pathologist, needs to interview me. I lost my booklet, so it is a routine procedure. Furthermore, I never donated a drop of blood in this Canada. I intercepted, most of her question, and sound to be knowledgeable in the medical field. So she asked me what did I study. I lied. "Business" I replied. "I just read a lot of Wikipedia". Lying on a Friday?

 Then come to the procedure, the lab technician also asked the same thing after I told him, "This vein is prominent, but it's darker. You can just blind poke it... no wait, you can blind poke for venepuncture, it's small bore needle. Ok just do your job. How many G is the red hypodermic needle again? I can't remember". I accidentally let the cat out of the bag. And I got the reaction I dread most. I told him, I'm actually in my final year before I got 'kicked out'. "Why?" actually it's "WHY?"... he is friendly though. We share our experiences of studying in the big city. He studied 10 miles away from my former faculty. Then, we talked about Jackie Chan because Jackie Chan movie is playing on the telly.

And yes, I have a new booklet. Yay. Although at first I was nervous, it's a new place and new people, new environment. I got desensitized in just half an hour. Thank you, for making me at ease. And apparently, I am the first donor today in the blood bank. Yay! They thank me for breaking the jinx.

Ok that's for now. Quebec Alfa Romeo is still dirty. Ughhhh.

*Canada is just a nickname. It's somewhere over the................................... arc en ciel, not the real Canada.

p/s my sister called me while I type this post. She asked me which rice to buy... I should open a helpline.

Quebec Alpha Romeo is here!!!

Finally, reunited with Quebec Alfa Romeo. It was more than a fortnight ago we parted ways...

First my 'Alfa Romeo' need a wash. Then it's time to give it a spin in this small city.

But I'm thinking of going to Canada to donate blood. It's kinda an addiction.

(I'm not delusional, it's cryptic)

Typical Asian Parent

Sounds cliche, right? There's no smoke without fire... unless you're dealing with dry ice.

My dear mother is among millions of Asian parents. This morning, she expressed her worry about my sister's employment status to me, for the second time. For your information, my sister is happily married and unemployed.

My mother is worried about what would my sister's mother in law think. She thinks that my sister should work as she is more qualified than my brother in law. My sister is a degree holder while my brother in law's highest qualification is diploma. To me there's nothing wrong. Maybe my sister just couldn't find a suitable job. My mother thinks her in law is 'the glamourous' type of person and would look down on my sister. I have met with my sister's mother in law more than my mother. She is that "glamour" type, but she's not like what my mother thinks. My sister's mother in law knew that my father and mother are more educated than her (that's what she told my when we were chit chatting the other day). I don't know her though and through, but I know she is exited to have a daughter in law. See how she dressed my sister on the wedding reception. I must admit, my sister dressed too girly unlike the normal her. And I know if shit happens, my sister can defend herself. (finger crossing, touch wood, fortunately the desk is made of wood... knock! knock!)

I could understand my mother's concern. There's likely to be frictions between in-laws. Her mother in-law, my paternal grandma wasn't kind to her despite the fact that, she's my mother's first cousin once removed. (Yup, my father and my mother are second cousins. Both my grandmas are first cousin... typical Asian marriage) There's always dispute between the two families. From how to plant fruit trees to land dispute. And it's us, the children, are the victim of circumstance.

And worrying too much runs in the family. Worry should be our surname. Imagine my initial, A. Worry. Don't laugh. That's a real surname.

Back to the issue. Asian parents worry too much. For how you look, to what you eat. My father, who always seems to be not concern about me, suddenly asked me if my allowance is sufficient just because I lose a lot of weight back in college. (he then, lectured me on not to starve myself just to buy the latest gadget i.e mobile phones). It's clear where did I get my anxiety gene from. They think that they are capable of controlling many things. If there's an Olympic event on 'Super-controlling-parents', my money is on Asian parents to win the gold medal. Even watching 'The World's Strictest Parents' makes me laugh. They are nowhere near to typical Asian parents.

Asians hate to fail. Asian parents would, at all cost not to fail or not to let their children fail. Are Asians that scared of failing? The image of a samurai performing the Seppuku ritual comes to my mind. Westerner's think failure is mother of success... and they would start of with Thomas Edison's hill of failed light-bulbs.

So, Asian parents, stop worry and accept the fact that you can't control everything.

To read more on The World's Strictest Parents, click the link below. Honestly, they are just a kitten compared to our Tiger parents*
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_World's_Strictest_Parents

*To get the idea of how typical Asian parenting is, click the link below
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_Hymn_of_the_Tiger_Mother

Generalization... and stereotyping

It is safe to say, nobody can escape from generalization. Say, Christians and Western Culture are sometimes interchangeable. Same goes to Arab and Muslim or Israel in Judaism. Arabic culture is always associated with Islam, Western culture is always associated with Christianity and Zionist and Jews are always an interchangeable term. So any barbaric Arab culture, Islam is to be blamed, immoral Western culture is spread by the Christians and all Jews are Zionist.

And it's always the minority among these 3 major Abrahamic religion who gets the brunt. Say if a Muslim live in a non-Muslim majority nation, he would be bashed on how 'Muslim' treat women or on barbaric Saudi law is and so on.

Same goes to a Christian minorities. One obvious example is Valentine's Day. No Christian denomination support premarital intercourse on any day. A marriage is seen as something serious and Holy, hence the word Holy Matrimony. And some deduct that Christians encourage premarital sex on Valentine's Day. Valentine's Day like other Christians festivity are being commercialized by Western culture. It's to increase sales during bleak winters. To encourage people spend more. Isn't it similar to Eid ul Fitr where departmental stores, or furniture stores gives special prices. So blaming Christian on encouraging immoral activities on Valentine's Day is wrong. Furthermore, not all Christians accept St. Valentine's sainthood.

Same goes to Jews. Not all Jews are Zionist. One example is Sir Isaac Isaacs, former Governor General of Australia who rejects the idea of building a Jewish nation. There are actually more Jews who rejects Zionism. But why boycott Jewish establishment, spread the news, or intention in Facebook? If one hates Jews so much, why does he or she open a Facebook account? Doesn't it defeats the idea of boycotting Jewish product?

So generalizing all Muslim as barbaric, all Christians immoral or all Jews as suppressors is wrong on many levels. One should separate Islam and Arab, Christian and the so called immoral, destructive Western culture and Judaism/Jews with Zionism. Some Arabs are Christians. Arab and Jews are Semitic; that is why some Arabic and Hebrew words sound and mean the same. Some Westerners are Muslim, and some Muslims are rejects/disagree with the barbaric Saudi law. Not all Christians are involved in Auto da fe. Not all Jews are suppressor.

See a person, as a person, not by their religion. We just worship God in our own way. We see God in a different way.

Instead of seeing the bad side of other religion look at the brighter side. In Manhattan, a Muslim helped a Jew when the Christians attacked the Jew. In Egypt, the Copts protect the Muslims while they are performing their Friday prayers and vice versa. In Central African Republic, the Muslims seek refuge in churches. There a more examples but we focus on the negative ones. I blame them on the media. They are trying to sell their news by making them sensational and bloody. That is why accidents are always on the first page of any newspaper (or at least local Chinese newspaper, forgive my racism)

So Peace, no war.

http://edition.cnn.com/2007/US/12/12/subway.attack/

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/world/muslims-return-favor-join-hands-christian-protesters-mass-cairo-tahrir-square-article-1.137961

http://www.aljazeera.com/video/africa/2014/01/car-muslims-seek-refuge-church-20141230156356670.html





 

My favourite YouTube channels

Some YouTube channels I subscribe but didn't really follow, but some are in my weekly/daily list of must watch.

BuzzFeed is a must. They are informational. I watch all 5 channels, BuzzFeed Video, Pop, Yellow, Blue and Violet. 

http://www.youtube.com/user/buzzfeedvideo

http://www.youtube.com/user/buzzfeedpop

http://www.youtube.com/user/buzzfeedblue

http://www.youtube.com/user/buzzfeedyellow

http://www.youtube.com/user/buzzfeedviolet

Next is Sotheby's International Realty, looking or watching nice beautiful houses. Who can resist it?

http://www.youtube.com/user/sothebysrealty

And for hardcore house watching (kinda sound like bird watching if houses are birds) is This Old House.

http://www.youtube.com/user/thisoldhouse

These are my favourite channels, what are yours? 

Top YouTube channels by Canadian

Here's my top 3 YouTube channel (by Canadians)

Sacha Stevenson, A funny Canadian living in Indonesia. If you can understand Bahasa Indonesia, it's a bonus because most of her video is in Bahasa Indonesia.

http://www.youtube.com/user/sasaseno

Second is Matthew Santoro. A cute bald man with is list of things. Pretty informative channel. Famous for his 10 and 50 list of things.

http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=matthew+santoro

And the third, a personal trainer. It's from his channel that I learn about Tabata and HIIT. He also demonstrate on healthy cooking. Brad Gouthro.

http://www.youtube.com/user/bradgouthrofitness

Honourary mention include:

Just for Laugh/Juste pour rire. Below is the link to Just for Laugh gags.

http://www.youtube.com/user/JustForLaughsTV

Funny Quebecois with funny accent (he made that purposely, I reckon), OneFrenchCanadian. I don't know his real name.

http://www.youtube.com/user/OneFrenchCanadian

There are more actually in my subscribe list. But the most searched and most watched videos are from these channels. I found most are funny, entertaining and just cool.

Have a nice day!

____________________________________

Also from Canada is Joy of Baking. Can't help but notice her Canadian accent. I don't bake much, but I like her cookies recipe. One day, I'll try making Nanaimo bars
http://www.youtube.com/user/JoyofBaking1

Edinburgh rhymes with....

I pronounce Edinburgh as 'Edin-bra'. Yup, my Edinburgh rhymes with bra. However, that's not the case to everyone in this region. For some, Edinburgh rhymes with an iceberg. So 'Edin-berg'.

On day I was asking a colleague of mine, how would they spend their time in the scariest city for their elective posting. I tease them that Edinburgh is notorious for their ghosts and haunted castle. An 'amoi' overheard our conversation and started to yell at me in a high pitched voice. "IT'S EDIN-BERG NOT EDIN-BRA...". I defended myself that that's how it is pronounced. And even asked her to find the correct pronunciation in Forvo if she still insist that her pronunciation is correct. Had she not yelled at me, I would not sound condescending. Typical ah mois and ah liens looking down on shabbily dressed person like me. I may not wear a Rolex or Zegna shirt or whatever brand is the most expensive or classier but at least I'm not a hello kitty fanatic like you. Everything is HELLO KITTY, grow up! (actually I wore my Renoma shirt that day... but the fact that I don't mingle with the upper crust makes her think I'm a simpleton). My colleague then verify and agrees with me.

One time, I pronounced Framingham Score as Framing-um. Like Buckingham or Birmingham, the H is not pronounced. H-dropping. I got the whole class confused. Well, that's my bad. Framingham score is indeed pronounced with a H. It's in Massachusetts, so no H-dropping. I'm not sure about New England pronunciation though. Do New Englander drop their H?

Well, in my defense, my colleague do make me confused too. They pronounced McIsaac score as MOSAIC score.

Scottish names are not pronounced as an English name. Another Scottish/Irish name that most medical student mispronounce is McLeod. Yup, Mac-Lee-Odd. Until a neurologist rectified us on the correct pronunciation. It rhyme with Cloud. So McCloud. Then I realized that's why is the Oz TV series pronounced that way. McLeod's daughters.

If in doubt, ask Forvo

*McLeod is one of the recommended book for physical/clinical examination.
.

Fitness... the evolution...

Nowadays, one can hardly miss fitness centre or gym in major cities. Even in smaller towns, fitness centres are everywhere. This is contrast with 10 years ago. I've been reading fitness magazine since 2002. Back then. I was just a fat geeky boy. I hope by reading fitness magazine, it would motivate me to a better physique. Imagine those buff beach boys in speedos or board shorts. With washboards abs where one can grate cheese. Pecs nicely form like a slab of steak. Biceps, big enough to carry sexy girls. Yup, back then, one can get orgasm just by looking at the cover of fitness magazine. Models posing, men women alike, they are just sexy. An ugly, out of shape lad can get his eyes turn green from envy. Or lusting to have those hard, ripped body no one can't resist.

So after finishing my O-level (equivalent), my cousin, Abigail and I bought some fitness equipment. The first equipment is 2 pair of dumbbells, 3 kgs and 4 kgs and a Kettler spring rower. We are still learning how to drive so we went to the town by bus. Imagine carrying 14 kgs of dumbbells in a bus during peak hours. I still keep the 4 kgs dumbbells. I gave the 3 kgs to a friend and the spring rower is nowhere to be found although I'll be glad if I know where it is. I miss those things.

Back then gym membership is usually exclusive to bodybuilders or rich gym rats. So with those equipment, we started to exercise. I manage to lose weight but not so much. Metrosexualism is still hot back then.

I like my dumbbells so much, I bring them along to college in 2005. At the college, I was looking for some 'gym buddies' but most of the boys are more into playing sports like football/soccer or well, football. Thanks to all the top football players, everybody has a football fever. Everybody wants to be a Ronaldo or a Beckham or a Totti. However some are into pumping irons. So my dorm is an unofficial gym. At least 5 boys would play with my stuffs. And I accidentally, turn one into a Hulk. Wow! it's unfathomable that me, a fat boy inspire somebody into fitness.

A friend of mine had a unique way to tone her abs. By lying down, and putting dumbbells on her abs. That taking 'pumping iron' too literal. By the way, she is now a seriously into fitness.

Sometimes, dumbbells are not enough. So my friend and I tried improvising a pulley machine. We tired a 15 kgs fire extinguisher with a skipping rope and pass the rope through the transom and pull the rope from the other side. Pretty clever eh?

In the University, I got busier and had no time to exercise. There's a gym next to the faculty, but my friend and I got intimidated by the buff, state bodybuilder. Reflecting back, why are we so afraid of bodybuilders. Maybe if we keep our fear and ego aside, we would be the one representing our state in bodybuilding or at least power lifting.

Looking back, becoming fit nowadays is easier than before with the proliferation of fitness centre, cheaper membership and more potential gym buddy and everybody is doing it.

Now my favourite gym equipment is a Swiss ball, dumbbells and resistance band. But I wish I can buy myself a rowing machine.

Service with a smile...

It's always good to serve and smile. It's a sign of hospitality. It tells that you are happy to serve, you are happy to help. It makes you more approachable by your client. And a smile can be contagious. You'll tend to smile back if somebody smiles at you. It our second nature to smile back if everything is in concordance. To smile back is to reciprocate or to show agreement. A baby would smile back. It's one of the milestone. In paediatrics, that's mean a baby is normal. Babies starts to smile at the age of 6-8 weeks.

But a smile can be creepy. So be careful to whom, where or when you want to smile.

Imagine, a doctor is smiling when you are at the ward. No so creepy eh! How about smiling before doing a procedure such as withdrawing blood? Kinda creepy. He might be a sadist. Or blood crazy. How about a surgeon smiling before an operation? CREEPY. Yes, a doctor can smile but give a sincere smile. Smiling while maintaining eye contact. Or smile coyly, if you're flirting. Well, doctors seldom smile. They are too tired to smile. They are like walking zombies looking for freshly brewed coffee. And by smiling a lot, you'll get bullied. Experienced by yours truly. And an always smiling doctor? One my doubt his credibility or sanity.

But, I still smile. It makes the world happier (at least, just to show the world that you're happy, isn't is kind of showmanship*?) And I got bullied by the nurses. Well, they would bully you but not as harsh as in house doctors. A nurse would bully just to tease you. Their excuse, it's the only time they can bully a medical student. But it would not last long. To survive in a ward one has to build good rapport with the nurses. They would bully you to help them withdraw blood, or measure temperature of measure blood sugar level. But, when exam comes, they would 'leak' some cases to you. They would tell you which patient is our subject for tomorrow's exam. The brief history. One even help me measure the patient's blood pressure during my exam. If they enjoy working with you as a student, they would help you to pass the exam because to them it's better to work with a humble doctor.

Building rapport with nurses is a good thing but some would misinterpret your action. An 'unethical' public health doctor** said I am flirting with the nurses. In his classes, he would give an example of nurses doctor relationship, and would mention my name as if I am a womanizer or 'nursenizer'. But the nurses know that my intention is genuine as I never flirt with any of them. Stupid lecturer, spreading false rumour. Just thinking of him makes me angry. His nepotism, his hypocrisy, his big mouth with no confidentiality. In one word, unethical. There's a story about him and a nurse. He was rejected by a nurse. Sourpuss! Maybe I should tell who he is, maybe not. But not this time.

Back to the main topic. Smiling can make you look good. Just look at Jason Godfrey. He's always smiling in photos. That where bigsmilenoteeth comes from (perhaps). Doesn't he look charming and handsome. To hear me compliment about other men, that means he's super adorable. Yup adorable as I have not a tint of green in my eye; I'm not jealous. Only adorable men makes me look at them twice without feeling jealous. Ok this starts to sound homoerotic. STOP. He's funny too, should read his column. And he's CANADIAN!!! I just wish he's my brother.

So keep on smiling, sincerely

*showmanship = an act during examination. To show the examiner that you know how to perform physical examination even when you're clueless. A doctor or an actor?

Well doctors always claim that they are a part actor, a part judge, a part lawyer, having a graceful hand of the maiden, eye of an eagle, heart of the lion, a detective, a journalist, a clerk, a police, etc. Sounds greedy eh?

**refer to some of my earlier post

and here's my favourite male model, Jason Godfrey.
http://bigsmilenoteeth.tumblr.com/
Can you give me some of your good looks dear Jason. Just kidding.

Good Housekeeping

Have you ever been the 'call-centre' of the family? When somebody have doubt, they'll ask you. Well, I am that person.

My sister is one of my regular client. Her questions range from which electric drill to buy, to which anti-fungal cream is better? Almost everything, you name it. Refrigerator, washing machine, clothes, fish, even condom. Yup! asking a virgin which condom to buy. She even asked me which brand to buy; Bosch or Black & Decker to Hitachi or Panasonic.

My brother seldom ask which product is better. He is more concern about service. Which bank is better, which wine shop, which mechanic. Sometimes he would ask, which perfume to buy or vacuum cleaner. Or how to cook something. Knowing him, he'll pay for the groceries and I would prepare the food. He won't cook, it's just a hint that he craves something.

My mother asked more on medication. What is this, what is that, Which cream is better, Which shampoo is better. Or when we go for shopping, she would even ask me which bra is better. Since I always go for bra shopping (not for me of course!), I memorize her size, in cm and cup. She would even ask which pot or pan or wok is better. It seems that I am the only one in the family who can distinguish hard anodized or enamel or ceramic non stick. Or cast iron, or aluminium or stainless steel. Or Le Creuset or Tramontina or Tefal.

Maybe, I should apply for a job with Good Housekeeping magazine or maybe start one if I am rich enough. Imagine trying on roasting pans, or electrical appliances, or new gadgets and give them a review. Roasting pan A - price *, durability ****, ease of use ***. cleaning ****. overall star ***
Roastin pan B.... I think you got what I'm trying to say. If you don't, subscribe to Good Housekeeping.

Or maybe start a column like Ask Heloise?


http://www.goodhousekeeping.com/
http://www.heloise.com/

-----------------------------------------------------

And a few hour after I post the blog above, my sister called me. She just mention juicer and I intercept by, "You should buy a slow juicer, but it's quite expensive....". She replied "Eh! how do you know that I'm about to ask which Juicer is the best?"

1732 km telepathy. Yup, I mentioned Hurom or Primada, but the principle are still the same. She thinks that they are expensive, and ask on my opinion on regular juicer. Then I told her a manual slow juicer which is cheaper and practical.

Chicken breast, yoghurt, cucumber

I am always eager to try new recipe. Some just popped up in my head. This morning I bought some chicken breast. There are leftover yoghurt and cucumber in the refrigerator.

I pan seared and shred the chicken breast, mix it with julienned cucumber and yoghurt. Add some salt and pepper. Voila! A recipe yet to be named. Maybe just a simple descriptive name like shredded chicken breast with yoghurt and cucumber.

Too bad it's not Kosher. What the heck, I'm not Jew.

(p/s I think maybe the Greek or Indian or Arabs do mix cucumber with yoghurt. Raita, Tzatziki. Not sure whether they mix them with chicken breast)

My pop's anger displacement

One of the reason why we had resentment towards our old man is his anger displacement. Whenever he is disappointed at something, we're the scapegoat.

This always happen. Whenever our cousin made a mess, we are to be blamed. And some of our cousins are opportunists too. They knew that my father wouldn't scold them, they would make him angry purposely. Maybe just for fun, I don't know.

One time, my stupid cousin made a mess in his hut. I am busy, so I don't have the time to clean up. (Yup, it's always us cleaning up other people's mess but we are to be blamed.) Assuming that my father knows it's not my mess, I just leave his hut messy and would clean them up when I'm free. Still, I got scolded. And he is also verbally abusive. All those harsh words can't compete with Odin's wrath. It's enough to say it's painful to hear his angry words. All the bitches, stupids and uselesss. He's always not happy at us.

When he is cool enough, he'll admit his mistake but never apologize. And with his poor excuses. He just can't scold other people's children. So, is that a good reason to blame us? To discipline maybe, but it's not right. Our good works are sometimes rewarded by harsh language. No wonder I am a big mess.

One thing I don't like about him is he's is too generous to reward other people but not his children. He would reward somebody even for the smallest act of kindness. And people would not believe me if I say that he is abusive. Verbally abusive. Even my psychiatrist. Everything is my fault they would assume. He is good to others but can't even show love to his own children.

Maybe, subconsciously, I just did what I did just to retaliate. Or am I too idealistic. That what my psychiatrist told me.

Since I carry some of his gene, I begin to doubt myself. Am I a good father material?

   

pretty women walking down the street...

Hiya... let's talk about pretty women.

My whole life, I'm surrounded by beautiful girl. Don't envy me yet. They are either my cousin, my platonic friend or just friend. And most of the time, I made many enemies with testosterone laden teenage boy. I made enemy without saying/doing anything. Because they are just jealous.

My cousin and I studied in the same school. Being cousins and being the new students, we are close to each other. Every recess, we would eat our food together under a romantic pergola. Yup, it's romantic. Imagine a gazebo, pergola with mature bougainvillea vines. It's like a wedding photo set. Except we are not lovey dovey. That's incest! Yuck. I am the nerdy one and she the hot one. We should be in a teen drama like "The hot and the nerd" or like Popular. (I kinda like the idea of becoming nerdy Christopher Gorham just kidding) or maybe our own series "Abe and Abby"

And there's a boy named Eli* who had a crush with my cousin Abigail*. We cousins are crazy bunch of people. We would just hit each other's ass just to say hi. So we always hit each other's asses or I'll just snap her bra strap. So, this shy Eli, asked Abigail out. And asked why she talk to a jerk like me. Abigail just ignore him. However due to his persistence Abigail agreed to be his friend or girlfriend?

Eli happens to be my nemesis cousin. So, one day he started a conversation with "I have cousins here. Would you like to meet them?". My cousin is aware of the feud between Eli cousin's Sherry* and me. So Abigail replied "Yup, I know you cousin. My cousin hates her!". Confused, Eli asked Abigail who's her cousin. Finally, Abigail told Eli that I am actually her cousin, not just a random jerk who simply snaps somebody's bra elastics.

Eventually, Eli started to be kind to me. Yup Eli is actually one of the hottest guy back then. What can you say... skateboarders. (And back then Avril's Sk8er boi is on the top of the list, billboard list I think)

Another incident happen during my college registration. My mother's colleague has a daughter. And she had to come to the college alone. Since we were on the same flight (actually not coincidentally), we decided to register together. She a sweet girl next door. A lot of boys in her former school had crush on her. And those boys were also in the same registration hall with us. A jock, her former schoolmate approached me and asked what is my relationship with her. We had to say that we're cousins or I am going to lose my teeth. There are so many fish in the ocean some said. And eventually, that boy is with another girl. And Jossie and I are friends like always.

Having a beautiful friend can lead to crazy night. My friend Marge* is in town for an interview. So Simone and I acted like her 'groupie'. We escorted her to the interview and at night we had our dinner together. We had our dinner in a music lounge. One of the boy from the band is interested with Marge. So they (the boy and his band) brought us to a club. It's a crazy night. I can say.

It's not always my friend or cousin who gets people attention. I got some too. That was when my buddy Gwen* bring me out to a club. Actually, I'm the designated driver. It's not really my scene but I have to do her some favour because I owed one. Since I'm just the designated driver I just wear utility pants/cargo and t-shirt. As we arrived at the club, all eyes were on me; that's what Gwen told me. I am oblivious to people's stare/flirt. Then we found out it is a gay bar. No, I don't feel hot. But it's nice to be the centre of attraction sometimes.

Having a beautiful platonic friend from the opposite sex has it's pros and cons. But what matter most is your friendship.

* not their real name.

p/s I'm always oblivious. The funniest is with Simone's 'dumbwaiter'

Too much to ask for and i am not the doctor

Yup, that a line from Alanis' song

Now, what if I am a doctor?

Perhaps, I could be an unethical one. Because the irony in my former school. The person who taught us on medical ethics is not that 'ethical'. You can read more in my former post. Lawyer vs Doctor.

Family pressure can lead me to become unethical. Especially my father. He always ask for hypodermic needles. (nope, my father is not an IVDU, he uses them for extracting splinters or puncturing abscess...) He also have the potential to push me to override the medical protocol. Once he asked me to ask a doctor for his prescription. I told him, he had to see one in order to get doctor's prescription. And he still insist me to get one. So, I ignored his phone calls until he sees one.

Another situation where medical ethics are grey are is when one of my family or friend to our family got warded. They would ask me to read the case notes laying on the table. When doctors make round in the ward, the nurses would put patient medical record on the table of respective patient. Once, my father's friend got admitted to the ward. My father asked me to read his friend case notes. Who am I? I am not his attending doctor. I can't breach patient doctor confidentiality. I should ask for the attending doctor's permission if I were to read his case notes. And I am not a consultant. Why would the attending doctor share the patient's report? It took me 10 minutes to argue. And because I am a good son, I did some physical examination just to please my father. (Yup, I am good enough to obey, but he still thinks that I am bad...)

Another incident occurred when my cousin was admitted. The whole family asked me what happened to her? My mother asked me too. I told them ask the attending doctor or my cousin. I can't just read the medical report, case notes and charts. But I did my best to give her the best service.

Some of my colleague know about my situation that time so they asked me how is my cousin. I tell them what I know. And they asked me back "So how, the Liver function test, Full blood count and the MRI?". I explain to them that, I don't read much on the report. And come the big question... "WHY DON'T YOU READ THE REPORT? AREN'T YOU CURIOUS? DON'T YOU CARE ABOUT HER?". Wow! my colleague scolded me for being ethical. I mum my mouth. "I SHE'S MY COUSIN, I WOULD READ THE CASE NOTES". I can't stand the criticism because I think I did the right thing so I bombarded her with my argument "IT'S CALLED MEDICAL ETHICS, I CAN'T SIMPLY READ THE CASE NOTES WITHOUT THE ATTENDING DOCTOR'S PERMISSION OR MY COUSIN'S PERMISSION. DON'T YOU LEARN THAT IN MEDICAL ETHIC CLASS?

It is our doctors are not ethical enough or am I being too idealistic. Even my psychiatrist/psychiatry professor said I am too idealistic...

Now I can simply say, don't ask me, I'm not the attending doctor.